Wednesday, February 04, 2004
A Look in Life's Window.
Author's note: Born from a line of "The Dormant Ingenuity of the Human Spirit".
On tip-toes, I peer through the curtain;
That night, I bore a fantastical burden.
What I saw before me stunned my eyes;
Life's window, a great and terrible prize.
An angry note on the fridge;
A woman jumps off a bridge.
Pidgeons out on the ledge;
Two boys hiding in a hedge.
Dancing at a fall crop festival;
Putting down a sick farm animal.
Great cake at a Polish wedding;
A Junkie in the corner sweating.
A leader becomes a dictator;
A baby is born only seconds later.
A joyful man kicks his drug habit;
His angry son kicks his pet rabbit.
These are each the beginning of an end;
Against time's flow, we cannot defend.
Great achievements and greater sin;
Choose your path ... ... now begin.
Author's note: Born from a line of "The Dormant Ingenuity of the Human Spirit".
On tip-toes, I peer through the curtain;
That night, I bore a fantastical burden.
What I saw before me stunned my eyes;
Life's window, a great and terrible prize.
An angry note on the fridge;
A woman jumps off a bridge.
Pidgeons out on the ledge;
Two boys hiding in a hedge.
Dancing at a fall crop festival;
Putting down a sick farm animal.
Great cake at a Polish wedding;
A Junkie in the corner sweating.
A leader becomes a dictator;
A baby is born only seconds later.
A joyful man kicks his drug habit;
His angry son kicks his pet rabbit.
These are each the beginning of an end;
Against time's flow, we cannot defend.
Great achievements and greater sin;
Choose your path ... ... now begin.
Tuesday, February 03, 2004
Needs.
I have needs, everyone does. My needs are not currently being met. Contrary to this blog, I am a fairly cheery person. This is the darker, more introspective side of my heart.
Divorce affected me in ways I was not aware. I am aware of them now, and am very unhappy about this. I want to meet someone, and bury my past. I want to live in the present, armed with the knowledge of past mistakes. I do not want to be my past, and yet, so many people cannot get off that train of thought. In short, divorce did not so much affect me, as it affected the perception of me toward other people. You know, that whole "DAMAGED GOODS" tattoo on my forehead. I, in some regards, feel as if I am viewed as "relationship suicide" to people. They find out I am divorced, and somehow, I become off-limits. Not to be campy, but "do I not bleed, just as you do?" Do I not feel pain, as you do? I am only human. Make a label if you want, but I am probably more in-touch with my emotions, short-comings, goals, and dreams than most people are. That is partly because I am divorced. It could also be because of my current humble living situation. I KNOW what I want precisely because I don't have it. Because my life was turned upside down, dumped out, and publicly displayed.
So, why am I leperous to you?
Do I represent the ugliest side of relationships?
Does that scare you?
That is what I believe, and why my needs will not be met soon. Time appears to be the only healer of my perceived disease. Not that I have given up entirely. There might be someone out there willing to take the leap with me.
Who knows.
I am not holding my breath.
That would not be autoerotic asphyxiation; That would be suicide.
I have needs, everyone does. My needs are not currently being met. Contrary to this blog, I am a fairly cheery person. This is the darker, more introspective side of my heart.
Divorce affected me in ways I was not aware. I am aware of them now, and am very unhappy about this. I want to meet someone, and bury my past. I want to live in the present, armed with the knowledge of past mistakes. I do not want to be my past, and yet, so many people cannot get off that train of thought. In short, divorce did not so much affect me, as it affected the perception of me toward other people. You know, that whole "DAMAGED GOODS" tattoo on my forehead. I, in some regards, feel as if I am viewed as "relationship suicide" to people. They find out I am divorced, and somehow, I become off-limits. Not to be campy, but "do I not bleed, just as you do?" Do I not feel pain, as you do? I am only human. Make a label if you want, but I am probably more in-touch with my emotions, short-comings, goals, and dreams than most people are. That is partly because I am divorced. It could also be because of my current humble living situation. I KNOW what I want precisely because I don't have it. Because my life was turned upside down, dumped out, and publicly displayed.
So, why am I leperous to you?
Do I represent the ugliest side of relationships?
Does that scare you?
That is what I believe, and why my needs will not be met soon. Time appears to be the only healer of my perceived disease. Not that I have given up entirely. There might be someone out there willing to take the leap with me.
Who knows.
I am not holding my breath.
That would not be autoerotic asphyxiation; That would be suicide.
The Dormant Ingenuity of the Human Spirit
Author's note: This is very rough, and will probably change, when I get around to it. Stay tuned, Kiddies.
A needless aim to an endless goal.
A growing sickness deep within my soul.
A certain and proper need to feel whole.
A lonely man upon a sandy shoal.
These are my days, this is my life.
Learn through conflict, learn through strife.
Learn to love your other, husband, or wife.
A solitary man in the dark with a knife.
Needless and endless, this is a truth.
But necessary to separate one's self from youth.
Out of an infant's socket will come the primary tooth.
A lone man crying outside a telephone booth.
A life, perceived, a need, a note.
A sickness, a derelict, a birth, a rope.
A Look in life's window, the foray of loss and hope.
A young man, full of sadness, learns to cope.
Author's note: This is very rough, and will probably change, when I get around to it. Stay tuned, Kiddies.
A needless aim to an endless goal.
A growing sickness deep within my soul.
A certain and proper need to feel whole.
A lonely man upon a sandy shoal.
These are my days, this is my life.
Learn through conflict, learn through strife.
Learn to love your other, husband, or wife.
A solitary man in the dark with a knife.
Needless and endless, this is a truth.
But necessary to separate one's self from youth.
Out of an infant's socket will come the primary tooth.
A lone man crying outside a telephone booth.
A life, perceived, a need, a note.
A sickness, a derelict, a birth, a rope.
A Look in life's window, the foray of loss and hope.
A young man, full of sadness, learns to cope.
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.